This thought popped into my head the other day, here's the timeline:
About 5mo.s after Dday I told my WH that I was taking about 5 days away to a hotel (ended up going to an AirBnB--big mistake but that's a story for another time) because I just needed to get away and really think.
He said that he would "really appreciate" if I DIDN'T do that, because he was afraid if I left, I might not want to come back.
2 days before leaving, I caught him in another lie (he was working on a project 2 hours away at the time he was cheating, so he stayed there in a trailer and I had asked him if she knew where he was living at the time and had they had sex there. He told me no to both, that they always met at her place. This night it came up and I asked again, this time he said yes, she knew where he was living and they had had sex there. I immediately told him that he had lied to me then. He responded with another convoluted lie and didn't back down.)
The next day I was packing to leave and he came into the room when he got home from work and continued to lie and refuse to admit that he had lied to begin with. I kept packing and was so done, I stopped communicating with him because what was the point? Finally, after almost an hour, he admitted he had lied and that he just panicked when I caught him in it, blah, blah, blah. Then asked me again not to leave, that he would do whatever I wanted, including go to therapy (which he had refused to do because he "didn't need to deal with the affair", only I "needed to deal with the affair). I kept packing and he actually made two appointments immediately.
On day 4 of me taking time for myself, he called and left a message saying it was urgent (I wasn't allowed my phone where I worked, so usually I just left it in my vehicle). I got the message on my break, but didn't really have time to call him back, so I called back on my lunch break. He told me that he had lost his job. That the construction company he was working for (small and family owned) was not doing well and the owner let him go that day, no notice, nothing.
Now, out of the blue, I'm wondering if he didn't actually just quit because he thought he was losing me and it wasn't looking good for him and he needed to create something that might bring us together to figure out and get through, or some such nonsense. Also, we had talked about moving closer to DD2 states away and this was now a possibility (as he a few days later, suggested that he look for a new job in that state).
So, am I crazy to think this? Or is it possible? There really is no point in asking him now, it doesn't matter (still working on getting my ducks in a row, still haven't found a job!), but I can't get the thought out of my head! Could he really be that diabolical? Be that desperate? But then why not put that effort into becoming a better partner? IDK, maybe I'm overthinking it. And like I said, I guess it doesn't really matter at this point.
